Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Whats a little sexism amongst family?

So I know you are supposed to treat boys and girls equally... boys can play with dolls, and girls can play with dinosaurs. Ok, Im cool with that. Im a hip Mom. Being that I just said "hip" totally proves my point too. So, equality of the sexes, feminism and all that goodness... yay! =)But really, sometimes you just EXPECT certain things from your Male children and certain things from your Female children. Atleast I know now that I aparently do. We had some fantabulous family bonding this past weekend. We packed a picnic (ok I packed a picnic), printed directions to Burke Lake, loaded up the new fishing poles, and all the fishy fisherman geer required to torture some innocent swimmers with thier lives , say "just kidding" and toss em back. Catch n release... Thats my game. Anywho, we loaded up the kids, the gear , the food, and OFF we went to go catch some fish. We took a bunch of non live bait, figured it was less messy, less cruel and all that. Turns out Burke Lake Fish arent really into Plastic worms or fish scented sparkly Playdough. They are into the living, squirming, slimey sort. So I shell out a few of my Man's Hard earned bucks to buy some WORMS, aka Canadian Night Crawlers, aka snakes in a jar. These suckers are HUGE! Its been some time since this girly girl has touched any wormy object voluntarily. But this was my idea, so I do the honors. Yep, Im the one who has to impail these massive suckers on the hooks. GO ME!! Yep I rock if I do say so myself! I squeeled like a toddler the first try though... *shudders* gross.
Well, Im thinking that My adorably handsome 7 year old Boy's Boy will be totally down with this whole worm and hook thing. Um.. not so much: "MOM!! Can you put the worm on the hook for me?" Wait. WHAT?! No no, you're a BOY, pick up the worm and stick the hook in it!!! Nope not happening. He used a LEAF to try to get it on there without touching it. *shakes head* Seriously? Unbelievable.
Meanwhile, here is my precious little princess, my girly girl, my baby, my angel... ya know, sugar and spice and everything nice? (remember I did say sexism people)
Well, she had no problems. In fact she was in love with these worms. "AAWWW" she says... "look at the wormies"

I probably DIDN'T traumatize her by taking this worm and putting it on my hook right?

Yep, this is my GIRL. I know Im not SUPPOSED to see this as backasswards, but really, It kindof is. So maybe Im a little sexist, ok, but it WAS rather amusing.
BUT...Drum roll please: Tre was the first to Catch a FISH!!! YAY! Thanks to my awesome worm threading skills *Woot Woot*
Here is My baby boy with his prized catch!:

Notice the brilliant worm skills I have mastered (worm still on hook) boo-ya!

He Didn't mind touching his fish.... Hmmmm? I have no clue! lol
We had such a good time. Of course fishing with children isnt the RELAXING experience we all hope to achieve with the popular passtime, however, there is nothing like seeing the face of your little kiddos with the reeling in of thier very first fish!! Im so proud!! One thing I will say, I made a great choice not putting a hook on Adriannas line. I think that bobber to the EYE I recieved would have hurt a whole lot worse with a hook attatched!! ;)

I love My Family! Im just too Flippin Blessed

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Clowns and such

So people hire clowns, and magicians, and farm animals and reptile handlers for Birthday Parties and other Wonderfull Holiday Celebrations, right? Well I have decided that I am going to hire one to come to the house to soley to entertain my children while I clean. Why not? Its totally worth the money. To be able to do the dishes without worrying that the kids are in the living room dumping half a bottle of vanilla cupcake (yum) scented body wash on thier $100 robotic Dogs back (ya know buiscut the fur-real thing) and rubbing it in to make them "fluffy". In case you are wondering where I got this very specific example from, yes it happened to me today. If there were a magician in my living room, with all eyes glued on his awesome dissapearing sponge ball trick, I would be able to clean the table and not worry about someone having a raging tantrum while banging on the French doors (glass) beacause they arent allowed in the pool today. This being of course because getting OUT of the pool last night turned into Dad having to get in fully dressed to drag thier butts out. If I hired entertainment, I could totally grab my shuffle and enjoy some Mraz or Jack Johnson goodness and TUNE OUT the high pitched little voices and not feel one ounce of guilt. This might even be cheaper than hiring a maid. And babysitters arent cheap either. Lookout Local Reptile Farm!! Can I get a discount for booking 3 times a week?... Hmmmm Must look into that.

Ok Ok, I'll get a NICE clown. I love my Kids, Really I do.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Bengie's Can kiss My A55!...now I'm really mad.

So I've waited. Decided to give the benefit of the doubt, plus Ive been sick so sitting here at the computer hasn't been as fun. NOW let me begin by saying that I'm not the type of person who usually complains about customer service. I know that people have bad days and sometimes you get good service and sometimes bad. Life right? Well, sometimes its just too much to ignore. There is a way to TALK to people. And Being RUDE as hell isn't one of them.
So Saturday night I decided that Hubby and I and the little monkeys were going to the Drive in!! Yep! Bengie's Drive in Baltimore MD, The biggest outdoor Screen in the US. About an hour and a half or so drive from our house. We've been there before and it was worth it, so we figured we'd have a good time and just suck it up and drive it. We round up the kids in Jammies, Get in our Comfy clothes and Slippers, Raid the Linen closet for blankets. The Drive In kit... the usual. Tre was stoked because the first of the 3 movies was "Up" One that he has been waiting to see! YAY!! off We go!!! =) By the time we get there it is pretty full and already dark, no big deal, we pay our $20 to get in and follow the guy with the light saber wanna-be flashlight. he motions us to stop. Tells us to wait. We do. He walks up the hill a little way, and we stay. He told us to. We follow directions. WE are cool like that. Then the Freakin moody dude yells "LETS GO!" at my husband like he is an idiot for not reading his gnat sized mind. Well excuse us! Like the good little movie going citizens we are, we follow his little light of apparent limitless power. On to the Next guy who is supposed to tell us what to do and where to go. Because Drive in parking is evidently a very tricky business. All the poles being the same color and all... Anyway, he says "Park right there". We Pull in. Then this guy who apparently ate the same pissed in cheerios as the last guy YELLS at my husband too. "YOU NEED TO GET CLOSER TO THE POLE!!!". Wow. Um, okay, closer we get. Then back up just a smidge so we aren't at a 45 degree angle staring at the moon. "YOU HAVE TO MOVE UP!!!" he yells. Now the way these people are yelling at my husband he must really look stupid or something. At this point the way they are talking to him, I'm actually already on my cell phone, box office number in hand, about to cuss some fool out! We drove an hour and a half for this?!!! Um no. We can yell at each other at home if we want to get treated like that! lol And save the $$. Now. I'm not going to go into how the first 2 movies went. Not horrible, not great. Not their fault. Skip Forward to The end of Movie 2 beginning of Movie 3. Its about 1:00 am. and my 7 year old is wide awake and wants "real food" so I get out of the car and Trek to the concession stand with him and wait in a flippin long line and pay for food, plus another dollar to run my debit card. Whatever. We got Food we are good to go, now lets get back to the car and decide if we are watching this movie or going home. Tre and I get to the Car where My wonderful hubby is in the passenger seat, little Angel sleeping in the back. keys in the ignition. I open the door. *&$#^@!&# alarm goes off lights turn on. I reach in and GRAB the keys out and turn it off immediately. The lights are still on and I manage to get them turned off. Over. Done. Right? Now mind you this is still in Movie transition mode where some people are leaving and some still getting settled into their new spots. Not eerily quiet by any stretch of the imagination. Then "knock knock" on my window. I roll it down. And Beeoch-zilla just makes the night complete!

B-Zilla: You need to cover your lights!...
Me: Oh they aren't still on are they? (all accommodating and apologetic)
B-zilla: NO not anymore, but you still need to cover them!
Me: Umm... (confused).
B-Zilla: You need to cover them!
Me: But they are off now and it wont happen again, it was an accident. Sorry. We don't have anything to cover them.
B-zilla: (interrupting me mid sentence) Are you STAYING or GOING?!
Me: We haven't decided yet, we just got back to the car...
B-zilla: ARE YOU STAYING OR ARE YOU GOING!?(interrupting me again)
Me: WE HAVEN'T DECIDED YET! can you give us a minute?! (I'm pissed the frig off at this point)
B-Zilla: YOU'RE LEAVING. NOW! (as she proceeds to get on her walkie talkie of magic and reads off my licence plate number to the box office)
At this point I'm ready to get outta the car and drop kick the cranky twat. I mean these people must of shared a community bowl of pissed on cheerios. Now, I try one last time to reason with her and the freakin lady (I use that term very loosely) wont even look at me. She just stands there all superior and powerful and ugly and stares at the screen. Her Magic Walkie and Saber in hand waiting for me to leave. I took my sweet a55 time waiting for my window to de-fog and pulled outta there. I went straight to the box office which was CLOSED so I got on the phone and started calling. NADA. So I call again Sunday and was able to talk to someone, gave them the info. Hoping that they would at least make it right. Not too much to ask. I gave them all my info, and have been waiting and waiting. NOTHING. I gave them a chance to make it right before I publicly bashed their service. WELL. SCREW THEM I say... It is now Weds and no one has even attempted to make things right. I drove an hour and a half to spend a good night with my Fam. spent a bunch of $$ in their flippin theater. And I get this! THAT'S CRAP!

So that's why I'm feeling a little like a raving lunatic. Because no matter how crappy your Day was or how much your Breakfast tasted like a urinal... there is no need at all to BE THAT RUDE!! You just don't talk to people like that. Period.

THE END (finally)

Sunday, June 7, 2009

I'm gonna blog about this tomorrow...

So its really late, we just got home, and I have something I want to rant about. But I'm going to sleep on it and blog in the morning. Beacuse otherwise I might just paint myself a raving lunatic and we wouldnt want anyone to get that impression. I'm TOTALLY sane. Honest. So look out for tomorrows Blog titled: "BENGIES can kiss my A55!" Stay Tuned.

Friday, June 5, 2009


Ok so I'm not sure what the fricken shit happened to the last one. It was all jacked up so I deleted it and started over!! I tried to post the other blogs that you may have missed on the last one. Wouldn't want anyone to be deprived of such entertaining awesomeness such as this!!! Hope this continues to work!!!

Today's "Lucy" Moment

So as all you parents out there know, When there is a Sofa, kids will color on it, spill stuff on it and in cases of NAPS, ... PEE on it. right? We have had this happen many a time. No big deal, clean it. Right? Well so I did. Take off the cover and wash it as usual. But for some Dumb ass reason I was channeling "Lucy" as I often like to do, and Decided to Dry it in the Dryer. Why? Just Why? Because now I have a cushion that would be more suited for a sofa that would belong in the kids rooms!! I KNOW better. Ive done it a million times and always air dried.

Well... "The Dez" isnt going to be too thrilled when we have to buy a new sofa. I know I know... slip cover. Not happening. I hate them, Loath them even. So no... But whats really CRAPTASTIC about the whole thing is that the sofa is in decent condition and now A stupid mindles mistake is going to cost me a butt load of money. Flippn A!

He Pulled it Himself!!!

My Baby Boy Lost his First tooth!! I cant believe how big he is getting. Time flies. We did of course try to threaten the door knob trick in order to get him to pull it. And He still wouldnt. So we told him ok... just go to bed then, if you swallow it you wont get any money from the tooth fairy. He still wouldnt. I said "Goodnight!" and started to turn out the light... that Got his attention. He got a Tissue and Pulled it!! The look on his face was priceless. Like he couldnt believe that he was brave enough and awesome enough to pull off such fantastic feat as this! Well here is my Goober... less one tooth! =)
The best part was when he went into the Bathroom and looked in the mirror...filled his mouth with water and came runnin out saying " Oh! Awesome! I can spit water with my teeth closed now!!!!" Such a proud Moment for a mother. =)

"You can blog about it..."

Well maybe I will!... UGH! So... Wedding. Yup We're going to have one. Yup Im planning one. Or should I say TRYING to plan one? So we have found the perfect location, the perfect lodging the perfect everything. The problem? Well... not so sure that we have enough people to stay in the house with us to make the cost low enough per person. And if we tried to cover the rest... instead of having more people.... then it will cost us quite a bit more. And just a little note.... its already going to cost us alot. Like a lot a lot. Soooooo What the heck do we do? I dont know. We both really want this place. But when it comes down to it, unless someone starts throwing wads of large bills in our direction or I find a large black duffel bag on the side of the road full of unmarked bills, its probably not going to happen. The one issue is that because we have to put a deposit down a year in advance, that means next month. And that means everyone has to have half of thier portion ready by then. Money is tough for everyone right now... and asking that is kindof crappy. Now, most of the people have already said that they could (some even could pay all up front). Even then, we are still short people. On one hand ,less people is great cause then most everyone would have thier own rooms. On the other hand, less people mean either everyone pays more or we make up the difference. Neither of these options are good ones. BOOOOOO I say. boo freakin hooo. Thats how I feel about it. Everyone seems to like the Florida plan better than the New York Plan. We do too. Who wouldnt rather take their Vacation time and hang in FL than Upstate NY? What to do? What to do...

Sunny Awesome lots to do Florida?
Pretty, not much of shit to do vinyard in Upstate NY?

Weekend in NY!

Last weekend we went up to see my Family in NY. It was a great time! Been ages since my cousins, Aunt, Mom and I were all in the same place at once. I miss my girls. Had a Family picnic and got to see the kids playing with their cousins... (well my cousins kids) and some other kids that were there. Conrad played horseshoes with the guys and games with the kids while I sat on my butt and talked and talked with the girls!
Who could ask for a better time? Ok maybe he could. =)
My Hubby and I also got some ADULT time alone with my Parents while my friend Amber watched the kiddos! We did some wine tasting in the fingerlakes. Seneca lake to be specific. It was an awesome day! Got to have some good wine and good conversation. We did of course have to put up with the obligatory drunk bachelorette partygoers complete with plastic penis whistles. What saturday would be complete without being entertained by a bunch of boozehags? Seriosuly people.... it's wine TASTING! Now a little tipsy is understandable... but laying on the stall floor in the bathroom is slight overkill. Nonetheless I Cant wait to do it again! One of the wineries we hadnt been to before and really wanted to see had some great wine and even better atmoshphere! Nothing like a little dive bar feel to make someone want to plop on the picnic table listen to some mediocre entertainment and kick a few back. Didnt get to loiter here long but definately next time! I just cant wait! The names of some of thier wine is really what made me laugh! Well hung, Two Banger, Gaitor bait, Skirt Lifter, Lonely Sea Man... you get the idea! =) Took the opportunity to grab a couple pics with
the Scenery!!! This Place was a riot! a little Banjo and harmonica would fit right it with the vibe. =)

And of Course.... Any opportunity to Miss Cali!! Thats My baby!!! xoxox


Wait. What?! No, no I'm the fixer of boo boos and maker of all things happy! ME!! Sheesh, one of the rewards of being a mommy is supposed to be the times where your little bundles of joy run crying to you when they get hurt. OK... their getting hurt isn't joyous, but the superhero like abilities of comforting and fixing is! My little monkey just got hurt. And I went to try to comfort and heal and fix and kiss. All the things that are my JOB, what works every time. WELL.... apparently not today! Today is the Day where only DADDY (who is at work BTW) is the only one who can fix this. Now there is blood, in between toes that I'm not allowed to clean it and I'm not allowed to see it. "don't see" she says, as she holds her toes together and cries. I tell her I need to see it and to clean it. Tell her "I wont touch it I promise, just show me". And to prove my trustworthiness I place my hands under myself. No good. Not happening. " I want my DADDY!!". *sigh* "Baby we need to clean it.". "NO!" she says "Just get me a band-aid". So I continue to try to get her to let me see and to clean it so her foot doesn't fall off in a few weeks from an infection cause I didn't do my job. And as I'm trying to reason with this little bundle of cuteness, she says: "Shhh. Can U stop talking? I cant hear Spongebob" as she places her little toe funk covered hand over my mouth... So now I am being replaced by the comforts of Daddy and SPONGEBOB. Whats next?....